"re: moved" – 4/19/22

tonight I am alone in a hotel room
thinking of you and "you" they are different
the one you showed me off the record
the one you share with the wider public

I like to think that the friendship I did my best
to offer freely and the loving support I chose
never to take away roughly were only rebuffed
because hope was sheltering, not because it

turned to hate which nonetheless I understand
is a thing that happens for some types of people
when disappointed in particular outcomes
out being the operative word when patience

like a tube of paint becomes depleted with time
making it harder and harder to move to the same
life-rhythm or worse, labored to be as kind as
cells ideally strive through distance's divide

still, I hail you from afar and cheer you on
hoping one day the plans we made playfully
when we were more assuredly ourselves
may still bear fruit in different weather yellow

sun shining down on pale pastel cheeks
transforming pallor to promise letting both
soul and surface shine diamond mines
sans damage sacrifice diffused in favor of

Muse, close cousin of commitment once removed